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Legend has it St. Nick used to reward misbehaving children with bundles of twigs, bags of salt, and strings of garlic. Considering these alternatives, a lump of fossil fuel doesn't sound half bad.
Duke Cannon honors this tradition with his Big Ass Lump of Coal Soap - a premium soap formulated with activated charcoal and featuring the masculine scent of bergamot and black pepper. It's the best way to clean up after mischief and shenanigans.